This post is part of the 9-part series: “Faithful Fruit.” You can read the full series here.
There was a season when everything felt like too much. My husband was deployed. My daughter’s school was calling almost weekly—I was constantly having to leave work to care for her. Around the same time, we learned my mother-in-law was sick. I was pregnant. I was exhausted. I was trying to hold everything and everyone together.
And then… there was Pam.
Pam was my director at the time—20 years older than me, with more experience, more composure, and what I now know was a heart wide open to the Spirit’s nudges. She went out of her way to make sure I had the flexibility and resources I needed. She made room for my real life, not just my work.
She didn’t just support me professionally. She fed me—literally. I remember her sending Olive Garden to my house after I gave birth, there was cheesecake in the bag. I didn’t ask for it. She just knew. And when I opened the door and saw that meal, I felt so seen, so held. She even sent plants—little green symbols of life and care—to remind me I wasn’t alone.
Over time, Pam became more thana director. She became a friend. A real one. The kind you don’t forget.
Even now, I can’t talk about kindness without thinking of her.
Kindness That Feels Like Grace
The kind of kindness the Spirit grows in us—christotes in the Greek—is more than being nice. It’s grace in motion. Mercy that sees need and moves toward it. That’s what Pam showed me.
Ephesians 4:32
“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”
Pam didn’t just show kindness out of obligation—she made it a lifestyle. Her kindness reflected the heart of God. And it changed the way I lead, the way I support others, and the way I think about what it means to truly care.
Kindness Isn’t Always Convenient
Kindness like that costs something. It requires time, emotional energy, and a willingness to slow down. Pam had every reason to stay focused on work, to keep a professional distance. But she chose connection. She chose compassion.
Romans 2:4
It’s God’s kindness that leads us to repentance. Not His wrath. Not His correction. Kindness.
It’s powerful enough to soften even the hardest places—and sometimes, we’re the ones being softened just by receiving it.
What Kindness Looks Like in Real Life
- A manager who lets you leave early without guilt
- A mentor who sends food to your doorstep because she knows you won’t ask for help
- A friend who never makes you feel like a burden
Kindness doesn’t need applause. It just needs intention.
Reflection to Carry
Who has loved you like that—quietly, consistently, without needing anything in return?
How might you be that kind of person to someone else?
Prayer
God, thank You for Pam. For the way she reflected Your heart when I needed it most. Help me remember that kindness isn’t just something I receive—it’s something I carry. Let it be the rhythm of my leadership, my friendship, and my life. Show me who needs grace today. And help me to offer it freely, like You do. Amen.
Part of the 9-part series: Faithful Fruit. See all reflections.
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